TO: Members of the Yellow Brotherhood of Llamas

[Crazycarl]

The guy in the mirror wants you to leave him alone, too.

[DarkeN_HellspawN]

For what I have dreamed for again in which is the the resurection of the Knights Templar. I have been doing much research and in my findings I have come to the point where these men need to ride again within the modern age. I am going over website designs at then moment and I am looking at recruitment in the physcial sense. We will resurect with modernized weaponry to replace the sword and armour in order to fufill our goals.

Those goals are of course is the securing of the Shroud of Turin and taking back the Temple of Solomon someday. Now this will probally will never happen in our lifetime but the groundwork needs to be laid in order to recruit future world leaders into securing these causes we find worthy. It is time to stand up for what these great men of age stood for and ultimately died for. Their heritage and what they started shall never be forgot since the sacrifices they have laid has given us what we are today.

With that in mind I am looking at getting the Seal of the Knights Templar place on my upper right arm to show that I now stand with these men of past. It is with this symbol I show this age of men that the rebirth has begun. I say that we say make a pact if accepted that all of the Yellow Brotherhood members stand with these future Knights Templar as one.

dh

[DarkeN_HellspawN]

upon my inception. Thank you for the sale of Georgia Peaches even though they are rottener then Anna Nicoles nether region when she was fat. Thank you for rasing movie prices to 10.50 a person so that I have to rob a liqour store when it costs $20.00 just for one person to go with a drink and popcorn. Thank You oil for without you the Arabs would still be riding camels and living in mud huts. Thank you cow for producing a gallon of milk that runs about $4.00 a gallon you fat grass eating fuck. I cannot wait to wear you as sneakers and to heat you up over the grill someday. Thank You Michael Vick for being the best person you can be. Thank you greenpeace for being a bunch of worthless hippie fucks who do not accomplish anything but bitching. Thank you Home Depot for making everything so god damn expensive I can only afford half of one 2x4. Thank you world for detiorating and losing some of your ozone your worthless bitch. Thank you NASA for spending 3 million dollars to fix a shitter in space. That you homemaker for not doing my house but my neighbors so that my property taxes will go up. Thank you big tittyed hottie for not taking your top off while you walk the block as I type this. Thank you college for promoting your stupid ass classes that have helped me nada in the real world. Thank you college for your tuition costs and you ever whining "You need college to survive BS you tell people". Thank you Hillary Duff for not looking like Hillary Clinton. Thank you Hillary Duff for being super hot. Thank you Australia for keeping the status quo of a prisoner Island filled with more Indonisans then Jonas Brohters concert in Jakrata.

Thank you mother nature...........for being a fuckin cunt whore who is going to make it rain in acouple days. I hope you die mother nature and I hope you burn in hell.....


dh

[DarkeN_HellspawN]

I am back with a brand new mission and that is again promoting the Yellow Brothehood in anyway possible to increase membership. Yes we may have a deal inked with Kraft Macaroni and Cheese in which will benfit all of us. You will be able to enjoy the cheeseiest mac and cheese ever made and enjoy the symbol of the Yellow Brotherhood on the back of the box with my email address to join. I am guessing we will be getting a shit load of applicants from grade school and college but what the hell we need members.

The clan business is that we need to generate at least 50,000 dollars in order to build a special sweet statue in praise for the sun. This will be positioned next to a national monument to help further our cause. Someday we might have a president of the United States of America who is a Yellow Brotherhood member. Fuckin A' Right it could happen. Like totally for sure. Once he is in power we will all become part of his cabinet and have sweet ass government retirement with healthcare that only the whitehouse people get. It will be so since I dreamed about it after I ate one to many burritos the other night. The smell of victory smelled like shit but it was still ever so sweet.

dh

[DarkeN_HellspawN]

People had their panties in a wad when we discussed what jesus looked liked when we was walking on the earth. I thought of him as white, Blond hair, blue eyes and of German descent. The jewish guy in our group about choked on his croutons in his salad when I said that of course. He asked me if I was serious and I told him that since his great, great, great, great, great x10 grand daddy was probally there and voted to have him crucified. There was a really weird silence until I busted out laughing and everyone took it as a joke or at least I think they did. I did come up with a perfect Jesus so that all major religions would be happy. Now Jesus was King of the Jews so that has him covered being kosher. He probally looked darker the the normal white guy as such as the people in that area so the muslims are okay with that and he had long hair in which the hippies and the stoners will be cool with him. I didnt say he wore birkenstocks you hippie fucks but he did roll with some sandals.

Anyways I was eating the best grilled cheese sandwich last week and I said to myself. This is the best fukin grilled cheese sandwhich ever. It could be any better unless Halle Berry drug it down from her chin to the crack of her ass and then handed it to me. It would be better then but possibly hairy so I would have to brush it off. What can I say I am guessing Halle doesnt have the time to probally trim since being a mom. You may think that is gross but you watch a porno starring Martha Stewart and tell me it doesnt affect you for the rest of your life. Imagine some dude going to town on her while she makes winter christmas popcicle houses with santa hats on top. Yeah sure she was able to make like 6 of them during the porn and they looked great on the tree but shit-me-timbers. It was gross.


dh

[Iggy]

Originally Posted by DarkeN_HellspawN

People had their panties in a wad when we discussed what jesus looked liked when we was walking on the earth. I thought of him as white, Blond hair, blue eyes and of German descent. The jewish guy in our group about choked on his croutons in his salad when I said that of course. He asked me if I was serious and I told him that since his great, great, great, great, great x10 grand daddy was probally there and voted to have him crucified. There was a really weird silence until I busted out laughing and everyone took it as a joke or at least I think they did. dh

I actually laughed out loud on that one.

[DarkeN_HellspawN]

or is Liz Cheney as hot as Megan Fox eating a large biscut and a peice of extra cripsy KFC chicken. She is rich as fuck and has a great sense of style. She stands up for her man like a women should and she probally takes it up the arse jsut like Megan Fox. I am in love with her but for some reason my wife has a problem that everytime I see her on tv or the net I drop the draws and scream YOOOOHOOOOO!!!!!!! The problem is I have four kids and fmaily is occasionally over so saying it doesnt get award after that I would be lying my ass off. Sure Megan Fox probally dreams of me and all of my smarts but I have to tell Megan now. I do love you Megan but my wife will take everything I own so you must take this vision of us being together out of your head. You should try going after Russel Crowe or Steve Segal. I give my official blessing to the two of them and them alone. Russell is cool and I owe him oney so of course I choose him and Steven is the greatest action star and ass kickingest man ever to grace the Silver Screen. If Steven Segal would have ended up in a western with John Wayne then John Wayne would have gotten his ass kick you pilgrim. People said Wayne was a bad ass but there is nothing bad about being overlly tall, slow, and with the speech of a Mr. Potato head. That SOB talked slower then Tammy Fae Baker after all of her makeup made her lips and mouth swell up.

Please buy the Mr. T Flavor-Wave.......he is really cool and really old and broke. Please buy a brother another gold chain.

dh

[DarkeN_HellspawN]

What is the deal with Sep. 3rd? Who the fuck cares but I do have an idead for most of your to try. I have recently pulled up the sex offenders list in my area where I live and I view it multiple times a week for a quick update. Now the child sexual predators is what you have to watch out for and I found one walking around the neighboorhood so I approached him quite nastily in the park and he thought if it would be best that he left.

I do not believe in a person who serves his time should be left alone. I say that you run them out of your nieghborhood and the next guy does the same thing so this guy has no where to go and hopefully shoots himself. I think that all child molesters should die no matter what. To do an unspeakable crime they should be dealt with an unspeakable punishment. I have no sympathy for someone who has to pay the ultimate price for what they have done. If you have kids you might want to check out the local list for you neighborhood to make sure that they are not hanging around your area. Protect the kids and even the ones that are not yours. You think you see some shady shit going on get your ass involved and in the middle. If you are in the wrong them apologize and move on. If you are correct then you need to handle business. If more people took these things into their own hands law enforcement would be less taxed and stressed. Streets would be cleaner and our way of live would increase.

dh

[DarkeN_HellspawN]

and I know what you are thinking......Harry Potter type shit. No no no..........I mean crazy magic like the Shaqs Kazam or some of that Kennedy magic that they used to brainwash a nation. Some people may hate me for the last statement but if you think about it that was some good shit. I am not saying they had a wand or anything like that or the three brothers had the power of three like in the show "Charmed" but it was close. I am guessing the John F. was "Prue", Bobby was "Piper" and Teddys ass was "Phoebe". With the Power of three they could fight all evil Warlocks and Demons. I am guessing Teddy was posessed by one when he killed that lady and letting her sink to the bottom of the lake. lol.

I do want magic however so that I can help the world out which would probally mean getting rid of congress and the senate with one blown and starting from scratch. I would touch the administration because my luck Joe Bidden would survive and we would really be fucked. I would probally go after that 90's group "All for One" and wipe them out for that fucking song "I Swear". Who knew a single song could make your gentials shrivle up and then you start listening to Barabara Streisand. If you liked her before i said anything about her then you have fucking problems. I would probally drive off a cliff with my best friend in the car seat like Thelma and Louise to help the world out. I do believe in Good and Evil as i read in a post but most people are evil by nature and I MEAN EVEN THE PEACE LOVING HIPPIES IN THESE FORUMS. They are evil in some way but that is just the way we are. It is too bad we couldnt all be friends but it is really hard being friends with people that are wrong all of the time. I mean that in the most sincerest way from the bottom of my heart hope to die.

dh

[Crazycarl]

Originally Posted by DarkeN_HellspawN

It is too bad we couldnt all be friends but it is really hard being friends with people that are wrong all of the time.

Quoted for quotability.

[DarkeN_HellspawN]

I am offering it to Hallmark to be used in their greating card line for a nominal fee per card sold. Right now I am looking in the million cards sold range for futures planning. I did pitch the next season of Charmed (Season 9) to come out of retirement and to take place back in the past with the Kennedys boys to the WB network. They turned me down unless I could rewrite the script to make at least two of the Kennedy brothers black. I told them it was going to be difficult but I could come up with something.

Cast: Charmed (Season 9) 1st Pilot Episode "Mixxed Up"

Jon F. - Played by Tom Selick
Bobby - Played by Tracy Morgan
Teddy - Played by Ving Rhames

Jon F. - How were both of our parents white but you guys turned out a little different.

Bobby - Its all about the magic

Teddy - Whhhheezzzz Putrazzzzz.......

John F. - WTF

Bobby - Teddy is drunk again. I hope he didnt kill another white girl....

*audience laughs*

John F. - Fuck he was driving my car

Bobby - Oh Shit. You better get a larger fishing pole because you may have to try to hook it from the bottom of the pond.

John F. - Fucking Teddy.......

Teddy - I ammddddddd eeettioupion

Bobby - I know what that means.........

John F. - What I couldnt make it out from heads or tails???

Bobby - He said he just magically pissed his pants......

John F - Fuckin Teddy....... Where's Marilyn at?

Bobby - White vanillia drop from heaven.

*audience laughs*

Marilyn Monroe - Hiya boys.......who wants to ****!!!!!

Teddy - YIPPYYYYYYY!!!!!!! Lets go for a drive.... ***Tries to motion for the car keys so he can drive but instead shits himself***

*audience laughs*

End Scene

That is all I have for now but it is coming along fine. Lets just say there will be allot of drinking and driving (see Teddy). There will be murder (see Teddy) while drinking. Also we have sex out of marriage (John F. and Bobby) and brothers brainwashing the country while doing it. Where else can a family so fucked up be loved by so many just because they were young politicians. Imagine if Barack Obama has brothers.........OH SHIT....I see another sitcom. I wonder how Nancy Peloski would look with a mullet.

dh

[DarkeN_HellspawN]

If god came down to the earth tomorrow I am guessing he would probally have 90% of the people here on earth asses kicked and the others awarded. Sure I would be getting more then one award but it is hard when you look deep down in your soul to deny perfection. I have been watching TV which is odd for me and I did notice that Dr. Oz is now getting his own show and quitting Oprah. I guess you can only hit that from behind so many times before it gets old. I am guessing it would only take once in my book. Oprah really has a fat ass and it makes me sick to think Dr. Oz had to eat it just to make a few million dollars.

Let me rephrase my tone. I would eat it too for that much money. Just as long as my wife okayed it since I would only get 10% of the money since she would take it all in divorce. Isnt that love......you share your life with someone and if they divorce you they get most of your shit. That is why I have invested most of my money into my brain so you cant take that away can you??????? I am keeping my brain and no one is going to be able to get me to cash my thoughts or expereinces in......unless its Oprahs fat ass in a red teddy with santa claus bag of money. I would take a brain dump for that any day of the week. Who says that people can not be bought? People can buy anything they want if it is for sale. I am a whore....we are all whores....working to just to make it or to make it more then others. So lay down and take it from your companies.

I am guessing that Jesus is still sticking with the long dew since long hair is still in even in the 2000's.

dh

[DarkeN_HellspawN]

You can get it in any effing flavor and type. It can be sweet to the taste or very sour. It can be magical with the right consitency on top until you get to the fucking dried out cake. They covered this pour excuse of a cake with something my poor dogs would not eat. As I continue to eat this to pacifiy my wife and host I come up with the analogy. This cake I eat is this world and it was really sweet and great until I was old enough to taste its icky insides. I have tasted it many times before but now the taste grows old and the same things continue to happen. I look around on my way home from work and I can only see a few people who actually seem to be happy with their life. Allot of them seem to be broken down mindless souls walking back to rest for two days to start the process again on the weekend. I smile at one who gives me the look like I was the joker and continues to stare off into oblivion. I scratch my balls through my suit pants and I release when walking that most people are mindless drolling lumps on flesh and shit just waiting to die. That is why I started to eat my cake again for I dont care how bad it fucking tastes since I am going to spread my wings and finish it to the last bite.

No matter what shit storm comes my way I will stand tall and watch myself in the mirror as I chant the song "The Piano Man" in the mirror before work. To become one with the world I have........touching its soil I can feel its simple heartbeat as the rain starts to fall and I get all fucking wet. My beautifull fantasy moment is now ruined because that fucking whore mother nature couldnt wait for me to get home before raining. YOU GOD DAMN whore I hold my hands up high like Elias off of the movie Platoon. An old lady happens to be near as I say to her gently.......I am sorry but you are not the whore I speak of. God to hell mother nature.....you and your saggy tree bark tits.

dh

[Caroline]

Originally Posted by DarkeN_HellspawN

Isnt that love......you share your life with someone and if they divorce you they get most of your shit. That is why I have invested most of my money into my brain so you cant take that away can you??????? I am keeping my brain and no one is going to be able to get me to cash my thoughts or expereinces in......unless its Oprahs fat ass in a red teddy with santa claus bag of money.

Hahah, too funny

[Iggy]

Do you know why Divorce is so expensive? Because it's worth it.

[DarkeN_HellspawN]

I have a friend who lost everything he had and around 400,000 total from retirement and savings but still he found that he won. It takes some shit to go through to experience all of that shit to think you won after all of it. To him it was worth it but was it really? I have asked him again and his tune has not changed after 2 years so I say depends on the case. I am guessing that it would be easier to give both parties a knife and have them kill each other and the winner gets everything. Sure it would be the women winning most of the times since the men would be falling on their own knife but at least they have a choice. To quote a friend. I would give up everything even my penis to be rid of the spawn of satan that has infected my life for 15years. I let him know it is improbable to happen since he penis was of no true value to anyone but himself. There is ebay however......

dh

[DarkeN_HellspawN]

It has been so long that I have posted I almost forgot how much most of mankind are morons. I mean if space aliens out there ever intercepts some of these people who post on these FF forums then we are really fucked. With all of the pussys that reside here combined they are for sure to come and take over and why wouldnt they. It would be so easy for them to convince the hippie pacifists that they were here for peace while holding a smoking pulse laser canon in one hand and "yes" they would believe them. Hell we may even offer them health care if they cannot afford it but hopefully they will die waiting in line for treatements. I have learned most of my alien knowledge from watching "Independence Day" and "The Bride of Chuckie" so please do not try to debate me on this. If I have said one thing and I have said it many times before. Space Aliens will invade someday and our presdient who used to fly in the Air Force will even have to join in cockpit and join the battle again. I hope he bombs what is left of the Gratefull Dead before the battle is over. I really hate big fat smelly hippies. Big fat smelly hippies are as important to the world as Grape flavored wart remover. If you like hippies in Birkenstocks then I really feel for you.

I am done with the hate know and know I am back on the love side of things. Except when I think about mother nature because that bitch is a whore. Regardless lets go back to the happy side of things. You know what makes me happy. Bacon. Bacon fukin chapstick......

http://store.baconsalt.com/Bacon-Lip-Balm_p_40.html

This shit is bad ass. I think it is recommended that you do not wear it and kiss muslims. Ohhhhhhhhhh that burned!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I love pork what can I say but we all have our vices. So I am here god............I can go now since this shit is heaven.

dh

[DarkeN_HellspawN]

or some of you may call them newly minted moms. I love moms. I am married to one and I was given birth by one but that does not make it right for all women to nurse in public. I am going to go out on a limb here to say that if you are a hot mom then you can nurse out in public. Non-hot moms should have special places to go since I had the chance to see a fat titty at the mall when the baby yanked off and exposed it before everyone could turn a blind eye. She had to be 375lbish and those things were not what someone would think a booby looks like. It is hard to explain but let me tell you it should have been against the law. People tell me that people shouldnt be judged or treated different because of their looks but that is a lie since they are treated different. I dont dislike them or not respect them but I only want to see nice boobys out in the open in situations like this. I am willing to use breast milk in my coffee as long as it comes from a hot mom.

Since most of the people will never make it to this paragraph since they will be so disgusted I am guessing they are too busy typing up ways to kill me. Since that is the issue I am going to take the time to say to everyone that is discusted with me too fuck off since they will never read this. I do mean the "fuck off" in the nicest way and I dont want you to feel bad about it. Some people in this world are pricks and you could definately be one of them. How in the hell do I know unless you tell me. Regardless we need people like you in the world. If the world was perfect it would be boring as hell while most would be listening to Miley Cyrus and eating deep dish pizza. If you take anything from this thread I want it to be this. You are special to somebody.

dh

[reaper18]

Originally Posted by DarkeN_HellspawN

or some of you may call them newly minted moms. I love moms.

Got MILF?

[DarkeN_HellspawN]

As popular belief goes you cannot get chocolate milk out off them without some additional aprartusus. I did try it and it does not work no matter how hard you milk them. I did however try many of time my lucky Irish twins.

Now back to the day to day of life as the world turns and bites you in the ass the other way around. I have decided to increase my education by teaching myself new ideas and skills. I have first decided to study in detaill the Karma Sutra for "one" book. I have also tried to learn how to ski and how to learn how to debate with people from different cultures. It is diffiucult since my classmates are mostly swahili but once I usally start out dissing Shaka Zulu in my first opening statement and it cluster fucks them up so you are looking at the undefeated champion as of now. It takes allot of hard work and dedication to beat a bunch of guys in grass skirts with spears but you try it.

I have decided that since the football season is here that I am offically retired from playing FF on sundays. I know I know............without me on the talos server that most of you want to kill yourselfs. I will say that please do not do it on my account since I really care about you and I do not want to have to fill out police statements once they read this thread. Anywhoos the furture is tommorrow and I am awaiting it by clipping my toenails and brushing my beautiful hair after shampooing it win Mane N' Tail. Silky smooth......

I am working on a movie script that should be coming out very soon so everyone prepare to open those wallets since I am looking for venture capitalists.

dh