Breaking News in Arizona!

o_zsilver_fox · 10-31-2006, 02:53 AM

The Arizona Republic
Monday, October 30, 2006

Phoenix, AZ-- A seven-year-old boy was at the center of a Phoenix court room drama yesterday when he challenged a court ruling over who should have custody of him. The boy has a history of being beaten by his parents, and the judge initially awarded custody to his aunt, in keeping with child custody law and regulations requiring that family unity be maintained to the degree possible. The boy surprised the court when he proclaimed that his Aunt beat him more than his parents and he adamantly refused to live with her. When the judge then suggested that he live with his grandparents, the boy cried out that they also beat him.

After considering the remainder of the immediate family and learning that domestic violence was apparently a way of life among them, the judge took the unprecedented step of allowing the boy to propose who should have custody of him. After two recesses to check legal references and confer with child welfare officials, the judge granted temporary custody to the Arizona Cardinals, whom the boy firmly believes is not capable of beating anyone.

o_backstaber · 10-31-2006, 02:55 AM

Woah. Sounds like something I would do.

Circuitous · 10-31-2006, 03:01 AM

Could swear Innoc or HG posted this before.

o_bumgravy · 10-31-2006, 03:07 AM

I dunno who the cardinals are, presumably some sucky sports-related dudes, but i still did lol.

Is this a joke at the expense of actual news, or made up news to make a joke?

o_theres *nothing* here · 10-31-2006, 04:59 AM

Must be a baseball team.

o_docwolfe · 10-31-2006, 07:17 AM

pretty old

o_zsilver_fox · 11-01-2006, 01:57 AM

Yea but this is FF :P. We always post old shit.

o_|404|innoc-tpf- · 11-01-2006, 04:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Circuitous

Could swear Innoc or HG posted this before.

It's certainly my caliber of joke! Nice to know someone else can pick up slack there if need be!

o_soundchaser · 11-01-2006, 06:38 AM

lol....that's a good one. never heard it.

love how people always have to say.. "OMG!!! HAVE YOU BEEN LIVING IN A CAVE!?!?!?? THAT'S SOOOOOO 1865!!! YOU MUST BE A FREAK OR SOMETHING!!!! DUDE!!! IT'S SOOO OLD!~!!

o_sobe green · 11-01-2006, 06:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Circuitous

Could swear Innoc or HG posted this before.

I thought the almighty old one posted it.

o_nezumi · 11-01-2006, 12:38 PM

It was especially funny for me 'cause I totally didn't see a joke coming.

10-31-2006, 02:53 AM	#1
o_zsilver_fox Join Date: Mar 2005 Posts Rated Helpful 2 Times	Breaking News in Arizona! The Arizona Republic Monday, October 30, 2006 Phoenix, AZ-- A seven-year-old boy was at the center of a Phoenix court room drama yesterday when he challenged a court ruling over who should have custody of him. The boy has a history of being beaten by his parents, and the judge initially awarded custody to his aunt, in keeping with child custody law and regulations requiring that family unity be maintained to the degree possible. The boy surprised the court when he proclaimed that his Aunt beat him more than his parents and he adamantly refused to live with her. When the judge then suggested that he live with his grandparents, the boy cried out that they also beat him. After considering the remainder of the immediate family and learning that domestic violence was apparently a way of life among them, the judge took the unprecedented step of allowing the boy to propose who should have custody of him. After two recesses to check legal references and confer with child welfare officials, the judge granted temporary custody to the Arizona Cardinals, whom the boy firmly believes is not capable of beating anyone.

10-31-2006, 03:01 AM	#3
Circuitous Useless Retired FF Staff Join Date: Jun 2005 Class/Position: D Soldier, O Scout Gametype: AvD Posts Rated Helpful 9 Times	Could swear Innoc or HG posted this before. __________________ Look at all those dead links.

10-31-2006, 02:55 AM	#2
o_backstaber Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: New Jersey, USA! Posts Rated Helpful 0 Times	Woah. Sounds like something I would do.

10-31-2006, 03:07 AM	#4
o_bumgravy Join Date: Dec 2005 Posts Rated Helpful 0 Times	I dunno who the cardinals are, presumably some sucky sports-related dudes, but i still did lol. Is this a joke at the expense of actual news, or made up news to make a joke?

10-31-2006, 04:59 AM	#5
o_theres nothing here Join Date: May 2005 Posts Rated Helpful 0 Times	Must be a baseball team.

10-31-2006, 07:17 AM	#6
o_docwolfe Join Date: May 2005 Location: Newcastle Upon Tyne, England Posts Rated Helpful 0 Times	pretty old

11-01-2006, 01:57 AM	#7
o_zsilver_fox Join Date: Mar 2005 Posts Rated Helpful 2 Times	Yea but this is FF :P. We always post old shit.

11-01-2006, 06:38 AM	#9
o_soundchaser Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Cow Hampshire USA Posts Rated Helpful 0 Times	lol....that's a good one. never heard it. love how people always have to say.. "OMG!!! HAVE YOU BEEN LIVING IN A CAVE!?!?!?? THAT'S SOOOOOO 1865!!! YOU MUST BE A FREAK OR SOMETHING!!!! DUDE!!! IT'S SOOO OLD!~!!

11-01-2006, 12:38 PM	#11
o_nezumi Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: The Peoples Republic of Harmfull Free Radicals Posts Rated Helpful 0 Times	It was especially funny for me 'cause I totally didn't see a joke coming.

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