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Old 10-11-2006, 01:41 AM   #1
o_zsilver_fox
 
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Gifts for her father?

Meeting the parents this Saturday night... I'm contemplating various gifts. How would extra small condoms and a bottle of Viagara go with him?
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Old 10-11-2006, 01:47 AM   #2
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lasting over 4 hours?... thats not a medical problem, that a scheduling issue! and what are you gonna call your doctor for? to fill him in on the juicy details?
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Old 10-11-2006, 02:09 AM   #3
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Well if it gets caught in your throat, you may end up with a stiff neck too...
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Old 10-11-2006, 02:29 AM   #4
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how about some pregnant girl's ultrasound

in the middle of dinner, reach into your coat pocket and gently toss it on his dinner. then stand up, pee in moms face, and walk out?
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Old 10-11-2006, 03:12 AM   #5
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Well I'd love to pee on her mom's face, but she won't be there... hmmm...
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Old 10-11-2006, 04:09 AM   #6
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Both you and the chick should show up butt naked, saying that you are now both nudists. They have sex durring dinner.
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Old 10-15-2006, 10:37 PM   #7
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So how did it go silver? I think mooga had the right idea, but you must share what happened.
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Old 10-15-2006, 11:09 PM   #8
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Everything went great . Her father wasn't all to crazy about us cuddling while he was awake watching NASCAR (I live in Iowa), but when he went to bed, we huggled on the couch and watched Rent, which is an awsome movie, especially when holding the hand of your lover, your arm around her shoulder as she rests her head on your shoulder...

Yup, six years we were apart, so it was great to see her again .
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Old 10-15-2006, 11:39 PM   #9
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I just threw up.
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Old 10-16-2006, 12:01 AM   #10
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Yeah that sounded really gay. It was like "ok...." until you mentioned Rent. I'll bet anyone else on this forum would have ripped her clothes off at dinner, thrown her upon the turkey on the dinner table, and just fucked her hardcore right then and there. And if her parents said anything, you should've said "STFU YOU FUCKING SHITFACED COCK MASTER CAN'T YOU SEE I'M HAMMERING MY COCK INTO YOUR DAUGHTER?!" Then when you got done you should've forced her parents to eat the turkey at the business end of a shovel and be like "HOW DO YOU LIKE IT BITCH?! DOES IT TASTE LIKE SEX?!"

I'm real sorry about that...but we all know it's true.
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Old 10-16-2006, 01:40 AM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DancingFool
Yeah that sounded really gay. It was like "ok...." until you mentioned Rent. I'll bet anyone else on this forum would have ripped her clothes off at dinner, thrown her upon the turkey on the dinner table, and just fucked her hardcore right then and there. And if her parents said anything, you should've said "STFU YOU FUCKING SHITFACED COCK MASTER CAN'T YOU SEE I'M HAMMERING MY COCK INTO YOUR DAUGHTER?!" Then when you got done you should've forced her parents to eat the turkey at the business end of a shovel and be like "HOW DO YOU LIKE IT BITCH?! DOES IT TASTE LIKE SEX?!"

I'm real sorry about that...but we all know it's true.
I would also have included piss, pot and some cheese.
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Old 10-16-2006, 01:49 AM   #12
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And now we wait and watch as she drains him of life and money and soul. Poor bastard.
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Old 10-16-2006, 02:28 AM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DancingFool
Yeah that sounded really gay. It was like "ok...." until you mentioned Rent. I'll bet anyone else on this forum would have ripped her clothes off at dinner, thrown her upon the turkey on the dinner table, and just fucked her hardcore right then and there. And if her parents said anything, you should've said "STFU YOU FUCKING SHITFACED COCK MASTER CAN'T YOU SEE I'M HAMMERING MY COCK INTO YOUR DAUGHTER?!" Then when you got done you should've forced her parents to eat the turkey at the business end of a shovel and be like "HOW DO YOU LIKE IT BITCH?! DOES IT TASTE LIKE SEX?!"

I'm real sorry about that...but we all know it's true.
That's next week's plan.
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Old 10-16-2006, 02:36 AM   #14
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Kudos to you then.
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Old 10-16-2006, 03:11 AM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by zSilver_Fox
we huggled on the couch and watched Rent, which is an awsome movie, especially when holding the hand of your lover, your arm around her shoulder as she rests her head on your shoulder...
As much as I hate to do this... Isn't Rent about gay lovers? A straight guy wanting it with his straight girlfriend... One of you has to be thinking something over
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Old 10-16-2006, 03:12 AM   #16
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Well we're both bisexual actually, and it's still a great musical and movie.
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Old 10-16-2006, 03:18 AM   #17
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TMI ALERT.
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Old 10-16-2006, 04:15 AM   #18
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\_/ <--- See that?


The care cup is empty :P.
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Old 10-16-2006, 04:25 AM   #19
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That looks sort of like a rum glass....no, I must resist, not before bed.
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Old 10-16-2006, 11:05 AM   #20
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This has to be THE best thread I have ever read in over a year
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