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Old 05-07-2013, 01:34 AM   #21
iAmaNoob
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Duct tape the switch on your dick so that it can't budge and Abe will never turn you on again.

apply duck tape to switch in off position

Bigfoot torn out my penis when I was in the woods, what should I do?
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Old 05-07-2013, 02:38 AM   #22
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Try masturbating.

This skunk keeps staring at me, please help.
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Old 05-08-2013, 11:54 AM   #23
Elmo
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1. Get a mirror
2. Catch and kill the skunk
3. Remove all of the skunk's insides
4. Put your head inside the skunk and look through it's eye sockets into the mirror back at yourself until you understand the skunk's reasoning.



I cant control my bladder when tickled. It's very embarrassing, please help.
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Old 05-08-2013, 03:28 PM   #24
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Use toenail clippers for a complete circumcision.

I really need my anal hair braided into shittails.
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Old 05-08-2013, 05:02 PM   #25
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Well that's easy. First you must eat a lot of spicy food so your shit will be really loose. When you do shit, refuse to wipe for a week. This will help form the dingleberries on your ass hairs. Once dried, you can start braiding them.

How can I turn my god-like talent as a gamer into something more tangible in the real world?
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Old 05-09-2013, 04:14 AM   #26
iAmaNoob
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Think of the real world as a game.

My penis which Bigfoot torn out is covered in warts and now it has spread across the wood. Every living animal there are infected by the warts. What should I do?
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Old 05-09-2013, 09:17 PM   #27
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You should build a giant cage filled with delicious animal food to catch all the animals, and then wear a fur suit to win the animals' trust. After this you should start sexual relations with the animals.

I have a real urge to play the church organ, but I don't want to lose all of my cool friends. What should I do?
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Old 07-22-2013, 08:34 AM   #28
iAmaNoob
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Play it, then make new friends



I stepped in shit, what should I do?
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Old 07-23-2013, 10:35 PM   #29
Iggy
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Lick footware until clean.

I broke my headphones, therefor I can't play any games without disturbing my wife.
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