'Twas The Night Before Release

o_ihmhi · 12-24-2006, 02:42 AM

I posted this in the middle of the X-mas thread and on some TFC server forums I play on... it is a rewritten version of "The Night Before Christmas" honoring Fortress Forever's release, which many people have said would be the best holiday gift ever.

I got a lot of positive reaction from it, and although it did not take me very long to come up with it (I had been mulling it over for days in the back of my mind), I am very proud of how it came out. With a little more than 24 hours to go I thought it was appropriate to give it its own place here so those who might have missed it have a chance to have a look.

Please forgive me for having a little indulgence; I hope that I can put a smile (even a smirk) on your face and make your holidays a little better.

Of course, the devs could release the game tomorrow and make everyone happy *cough* *cough* but take your time boys. ^.^'

So, with no further adu... ado... adieu? Uh... well, no more waiting, here it is!

= = = = = =

The Night Before Release

'Twas the night before Release,
and all through the house,
Not a player was capping,
Not even a Scout.

The SGs were placed,
In the ramp room with care,
In hopes that the Medics,
Would suck it down in the air.

The fatties were nestled,
All snug in the water,
Waiting for noobs to
jump into the slaughter.

A spy as a Soldier
was inside our base,
While enemy snipers
Shot sh4x in the face.

When out in the yard
There arose such a clatter
I jumped off the bments
To see what was the matter!

Up off the deck
I conced like a flash
When one of our snipers
Shot me right in the... er, ash.

A detpack was placed
on the bridge, in our way,
While a noob demo shouted
"Base Snipers - GAY!"

When, what to my
wondering eyes should appear,
But a member of [ . ]
With a gun I should ph34r!

With a little old AR
So lively and quick
He gunned my ass down
And I called him a dick.

More rapid than Scouts
the yard spam had come
While a flurry of napalm
Had toasted my bum.

"Now Lamers! Now Noobs!
HW - Gay!"
Said a 12 year old boy
Who got banned for a day.

"The enemy flag's
at the top of the spiral"
And a medic was needed
To provide antivirals!

A robotic voice said
"One Minute Remaining"
So I changed class to Solly
For maximum maiming.

Like a pro I rocket jumped
Clear cross the yard
And brought down my vengeance
On some AFK tard.

I ran for the flag,
just a meter away,
While Mervaka the fatty
Tried to pray and spray.

I grabbed it and like
a flash I was gone!
And I pissed off tu!
By sayin' stuff 'bout his mom.

Back over the bridge,
My team's corpses all 'round,
The snipers on deck
Actually came to the ground!

'twas a sight to see,
my whole team was there,
Covering my ass
(God answered my prayer!)

I rocket jumped up
onto our deck
With ten seconds left
I tore off like heck

Would I make it? was
something that I had wondered
My team would not forgive
me if I had blundered.

As the timer struck zero
My feet touched the cap point,
We won by a cap
Er, I can't rhyme with point! ^.^'

This was a victory
All ours, we could boast
We celebrated while Circ
Made his one millionth post.

As I left the server,
Being called a "dumb fag"
I said "Merry release to all,
And to all a good frag!

o_ducksausage · 12-24-2006, 03:09 AM

Delightful!

o_ducksausage · 12-24-2006, 03:09 AM

(I signed up just to say that.)

o_nuk3m · 12-24-2006, 03:14 AM

i was pessimistic going into this thread but it cheered me up. btw, for us christmas is monday not tomorrow

and i laughed at the line

This was a victory
All ours, we could boast
We celebrated while Circ
Made his one millionth post.

rofl. hehe

i miss clan play

o_ihmhi · 12-24-2006, 03:16 AM

I know, I posted it about an hour early. I mean tomorrow as by Monday, as in most of the people will read this tomorrow anyways. I just could not wait. ^.^'

o_nuk3m · 12-24-2006, 03:26 AM

I Never realized how many people from this board are from NJ. rock on

o_smax · 12-24-2006, 04:17 AM

Hhahaw nice one broheem, funny shazzle bazzle.

o_sh4x · 12-24-2006, 04:35 AM

lol nice one

I take it personal though!

o_sizeablessonic · 12-24-2006, 05:20 AM

Delran, NJ all the way. (We are in Philly now though.)

o_abjure · 12-24-2006, 05:32 AM

Loved it!

I really hope the devs can live up to their word about releasing before the end of the year. =[

o_-=bingo-bango=- · 12-24-2006, 05:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Abjure

Loved it!

I really hope the devs can live up to their word about releasing before the end of the year. =[

hope swo, if not christmas, at least new years eve

o_geokill-----> · 12-24-2006, 05:58 AM

Hehe I love it

o_shrone · 12-24-2006, 06:05 AM

Thats really cool dude, haha

o_gambit · 12-24-2006, 06:41 AM

nice man...i really enjoyed that

o_saberwolf · 12-24-2006, 08:28 AM

My favorit line was the one about Circ's one millionth post, good stuff right there.

Happy kwanzichanimas to every one.

o_ihmhi · 12-24-2006, 10:44 AM

Chrismahanukwanzaa!

o_nuk3m · 12-24-2006, 03:58 PM

FF is not being released until 1st Q 2007.

Jiggles · 12-24-2006, 04:22 PM

Yeah, it ain't comin' out this year. I am trying to put together some kind of media release, though.

o_diablo · 12-24-2006, 05:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jiggles

Yeah, it ain't comin' out this year. I am trying to put together some kind of media release, though.

That was kinda obvious, who really still beleived it would still come out in 2006?

im hoping it will come out end januari, since thats when im finished with my exams

Circuitous · 12-24-2006, 06:28 PM

Everyone loves the line involving my one millionth post. I'M SOME SORT OF LOVE-HATE INTERNET CELEBRITY. I'll try not to let it go to my head.

Here's hoping FF is out before that happens.

12-24-2006, 02:42 AM	#1
o_ihmhi Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Newark, NJ Posts Rated Helpful 0 Times	'Twas The Night Before Release I posted this in the middle of the X-mas thread and on some TFC server forums I play on... it is a rewritten version of "The Night Before Christmas" honoring Fortress Forever's release, which many people have said would be the best holiday gift ever. I got a lot of positive reaction from it, and although it did not take me very long to come up with it (I had been mulling it over for days in the back of my mind), I am very proud of how it came out. With a little more than 24 hours to go I thought it was appropriate to give it its own place here so those who might have missed it have a chance to have a look. Please forgive me for having a little indulgence; I hope that I can put a smile (even a smirk) on your face and make your holidays a little better. Of course, the devs could release the game tomorrow and make everyone happy cough cough but take your time boys. ^.^' So, with no further adu... ado... adieu? Uh... well, no more waiting, here it is! = = = = = = The Night Before Release 'Twas the night before Release, and all through the house, Not a player was capping, Not even a Scout. The SGs were placed, In the ramp room with care, In hopes that the Medics, Would suck it down in the air. The fatties were nestled, All snug in the water, Waiting for noobs to jump into the slaughter. A spy as a Soldier was inside our base, While enemy snipers Shot sh4x in the face. When out in the yard There arose such a clatter I jumped off the bments To see what was the matter! Up off the deck I conced like a flash When one of our snipers Shot me right in the... er, ash. A detpack was placed on the bridge, in our way, While a noob demo shouted "Base Snipers - GAY!" When, what to my wondering eyes should appear, But a member of [ . ] With a gun I should ph34r! With a little old AR So lively and quick He gunned my ass down And I called him a dick. More rapid than Scouts the yard spam had come While a flurry of napalm Had toasted my bum. "Now Lamers! Now Noobs! HW - Gay!" Said a 12 year old boy Who got banned for a day. "The enemy flag's at the top of the spiral" And a medic was needed To provide antivirals! A robotic voice said "One Minute Remaining" So I changed class to Solly For maximum maiming. Like a pro I rocket jumped Clear cross the yard And brought down my vengeance On some AFK tard. I ran for the flag, just a meter away, While Mervaka the fatty Tried to pray and spray. I grabbed it and like a flash I was gone! And I pissed off tu! By sayin' stuff 'bout his mom. Back over the bridge, My team's corpses all 'round, The snipers on deck Actually came to the ground! 'twas a sight to see, my whole team was there, Covering my ass (God answered my prayer!) I rocket jumped up onto our deck With ten seconds left I tore off like heck Would I make it? was something that I had wondered My team would not forgive me if I had blundered. As the timer struck zero My feet touched the cap point, We won by a cap Er, I can't rhyme with point! ^.^' This was a victory All ours, we could boast We celebrated while Circ Made his one millionth post. As I left the server, Being called a "dumb fag" I said "Merry release to all, And to all a good frag!

12-24-2006, 06:28 PM	#20
Circuitous Useless Retired FF Staff Join Date: Jun 2005 Class/Position: D Soldier, O Scout Gametype: AvD Posts Rated Helpful 9 Times	Everyone loves the line involving my one millionth post. I'M SOME SORT OF LOVE-HATE INTERNET CELEBRITY. I'll try not to let it go to my head. Here's hoping FF is out before that happens. __________________ Look at all those dead links.

12-24-2006, 03:09 AM	#2
o_ducksausage Join Date: Dec 2006 Posts Rated Helpful 0 Times	Delightful!

12-24-2006, 03:14 AM	#4
o_nuk3m Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: New Jersy, USA! reppin' Posts Rated Helpful 0 Times	i was pessimistic going into this thread but it cheered me up. btw, for us christmas is monday not tomorrow and i laughed at the line This was a victory All ours, we could boast We celebrated while Circ Made his one millionth post. rofl. hehe i miss clan play

12-24-2006, 03:16 AM	#5
o_ihmhi Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Newark, NJ Posts Rated Helpful 0 Times	I know, I posted it about an hour early. I mean tomorrow as by Monday, as in most of the people will read this tomorrow anyways. I just could not wait. ^.^'

12-24-2006, 03:26 AM	#6
o_nuk3m Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: New Jersy, USA! reppin' Posts Rated Helpful 0 Times	I Never realized how many people from this board are from NJ. rock on

12-24-2006, 04:17 AM	#7
o_smax Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Currently: Alabama Posts Rated Helpful 0 Times	Hhahaw nice one broheem, funny shazzle bazzle.

12-24-2006, 04:35 AM	#8
o_sh4x Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Montreal Posts Rated Helpful 0 Times	lol nice one I take it personal though!

12-24-2006, 05:20 AM	#9
o_sizeablessonic Join Date: May 2005 Location: Somewere in Nevada Posts Rated Helpful 0 Times	Delran, NJ all the way. (We are in Philly now though.)

12-24-2006, 05:32 AM	#10
o_abjure Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: Milwaukee, Wisconsin Posts Rated Helpful 0 Times	Loved it! I really hope the devs can live up to their word about releasing before the end of the year. =[

12-24-2006, 05:58 AM	#12
o_geokill-----> Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Fort Worth, Tejas Posts Rated Helpful 1 Times	Hehe I love it

12-24-2006, 06:05 AM	#13
o_shrone Join Date: Jan 2006 Posts Rated Helpful 0 Times	Thats really cool dude, haha

12-24-2006, 06:41 AM	#14
o_gambit Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts Rated Helpful 0 Times	nice man...i really enjoyed that

12-24-2006, 08:28 AM	#15
o_saberwolf Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Missouri Posts Rated Helpful 0 Times	My favorit line was the one about Circ's one millionth post, good stuff right there. Happy kwanzichanimas to every one.

12-24-2006, 10:44 AM	#16
o_ihmhi Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Newark, NJ Posts Rated Helpful 0 Times	Chrismahanukwanzaa!

12-24-2006, 03:58 PM	#17
o_nuk3m Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: New Jersy, USA! reppin' Posts Rated Helpful 0 Times	FF is not being released until 1st Q 2007.

12-24-2006, 04:22 PM	#18
Jiggles Retired FF Staff Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: CowTown Posts Rated Helpful 0 Times	Yeah, it ain't comin' out this year. I am trying to put together some kind of media release, though.

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