New Patch Features

[Jiggles]

I thought about posting this on the front page, but I figured the loyal fanbase should hear first about the exciting new direction FF is taking!

Below are only some of the changes; I might leak some more later!

New Map: 2fort

• Everyone will enjoy this exciting new re-creation of 2fort
• For better gameplay, we've removed the flags
• Instead, it's now a capture-point map: the first team to hold the yard bridge uncontested for 30 seconds captures that point
• Next, the team that holds the ramp-room uncontested for 30 seconds captures that point
• Finally, the team that holds the enemy "flag" room uncontested for 1 minute wins the map

Demoman:

• Blue pipes are still too hard to hit with, so we reduced the fuse timer to 0.5 seconds
• Mirvs are powerful and weigh a lot, so we significantly reduced their throw distance
• Detpacks are also heavy, so while the demoman is carrying a detpack, his movespeed is reduced by 80%

Sniper:

• By popular vote, the sniper is removed
• Honestly, no one liked him
• Even the players who said they did were just sticking up for him because he's a nice guy. I'm a nice guy too, but you don't want me sniping!

General Changes:

• Through playtesting, we found that new players don't have enough incentive to learn to bhop. So, we're removing running and walking. This way, new players have to learn to bhop to move around. We think this will make FF much more intuitive for new players.
• Additionally, we added a new movement technique called "sock-hopping" (patent pending). When you hop onto a teammate, if you both hit the jump button at the same time, you are launched really far!
• To balance this, we added another new feature called "tripping"
• Every time you bump into a player or take fall damage, you have a 10% chance to trip and fall down. Due to engine limitations on ragdoll physics simulations, you can't get back up, so instead you die instantly.

Soldier:

• To be more cool, we added a new minigame to the soldier's rpg reload
• If you win the minigame, you reload faster. Actually, it's kinda just like Gears of War. To avoid Epic Mega Realms from suing us for Idea Infringement, we added a new feature: failure
• If the player fails the minigame, the rocket blows up in his hand -- hurting himself and any nearby teammates
• What exactly is the minigame, you ask? Well, we haven't decided yet, but we're probably just gonna rip off that hacking minigame from Bioshock. It's not like anyone actually played that game, anyway.

Spy:

• Due to cheating concerns, cloaking is now 100% visible on all DirectX levels
• Feigning death is back! Due to an engine limitation on ragdoll physics, however, when a Spy feigns death, he is killed

Pyro:

• The Pyro needs some buffs to be used in clangames, so we tweaked the burn mechanic
• The level 3 burn scream sound is now played at all burn levels and the player's view turns completely red. Fire hurts!
• To counteract this new power, we added a new "stop, drop, and roll" maneuver players can activate to remove burning. Unfortunately, due to engine limitations on ragdoll physics, stopping, dropping, and rolling kills the player

Scout:

• Since players complained that the man pad wasn't useful, we added a new feature called "phasing" (copyright pending).
• When the player is launched off the man pad, he can phase through solid objects for 5 seconds. To balance this, when the time runs out, if the player is in a solid object, the player is frozen in place
• Also, we felt that the limitation of only building one man pad at a time was unfair: after all, engies can build any number of sentryguns at once.
• So, Scouts can now drop an unlimited number of man pads. To balance this, each pad takes 100 cells to build.
• To allow Scouts to build multiple man pads per life, we increased the amount of cells the Scout carries by 800.

Engineer:

• The EMP damage calculation is now simplified to "100 damage per cell carried"
• The engineer can now build teleporters again! To balance them, their build time has been increased to 900 seconds.
• The railgun has been revamped for added functionality. The railgun is now a hitscan weapon, and has a scope. You can charge it for up to seven seconds, but the engineer moves slower while it is charging.
• We also added a laser sight to the railgun

Medic:

• Due to concerns over performance enhancing drugs, the medic has lost his ability to heal and throw medpacks
• However, infection spreading is back! The infection spreading system is a bit different, however: dead bodies can still spread infections! We feel this feature is intuitive to new players. However, due to engine limitations on ragdoll physics, if a player sees an infected ragdoll, his computer will crash.

HW Guy:

• The assault cannon is still too powerful, so we removed it and added a new weapon: the pogo-stick
• The HW can now bounce around on his pogo-stick and instantly crush any player he lands on
• To balance this, the pogo stick has a 5% base chance to break. Additionally, the pogo-stick break chance increases by 0.9% each time he kills someone. However, if he bounces into a group of players, the chance increases by 3.66666%, unless he rapidly taps the mouse button, in which case the chance increases only by 4.99999%.

NEW CLASS: Master Debator

• To balance the removal of the Sniper, we decided we needed to add a new class
• This class has a primary weapon called the "Megaphone"
• Players hit by the megaphone's attack have their movement speed, attack speed, and turn speed reduced by the following formula: "2 x the number of posts the Debator has posted in the 'Debates & Arguments' forum section that exceed 100 words"
• The player can only remove these penalties by posting a reply to each thread in the "Debates & Arguments" forum section

This is only a taste of the great new features you will see in the next patch! Stay tuned!

[Credge]

OH MAN THIS PATCH IS GOING TO ROCK!

[Tsukasa]

Originally Posted by Jiggles

The HW can now bounce around on his pogo-stick and instantly crush any player he lands on

yay!

[Adamido]

Yay for april's fool day.

[Everything]

Fuck yeah! Stop drop and roll!

[thiz]

You're a bit late in posting. Some of those would actually be good fun

[Skillet]

Guys its April fools HAHHAAHA you had me up to the 3rd change sniper being removed. Good one Jiggles

[Hirohito]

Wow, I can't wait to play the new 2fort!

[pF]

^ Haha yeah.. sounds like an absolute disaster..

[KubeDawg]

*DO WANT*

Soldier minigame!

[Vicious]

lol that 2fort would be interesting though...

[[AE] 82694]

LMFAO Jiggles. Nothing better to than Fuck with us.

[GambiT]

hilarious!

[Da Spadger]

I lol'd. \o/

[Skanky Butterpuss]

weak compared to the april fools of 2006. but really, how can you top that?

[Desyphur]

Originally Posted by Skanky Butterpuss

weak compared to the april fools of 2006. but really, how can you top that?

I don't think I saw that one o.o

Linkage?

[Skanky Butterpuss]

they took it down the next day, so no link. they opened up a new forum section titled 'beta' and had a bunch of threads posted in there, about all kinds of new unreleased features and bugs and all sorts of crazy shit, some of which actually sounded cool. it was absolutely epic.

[Mr. Happy]

lol, this one was good

I completely believed this until I read ths sniper is removed

[Desyphur]

Originally Posted by Skanky Butterpuss

they took it down the next day, so no link. they opened up a new forum section titled 'beta' and had a bunch of threads posted in there, about all kinds of new unreleased features and bugs and all sorts of crazy shit, some of which actually sounded cool. it was absolutely epic.

lol

Awesome.

The patch notes in this thread sound like Valve logic :O

[myersjr]

Woot..