Condom Game! - Page 2

o_mooga · 02-21-2006, 01:24 AM

"You must accept the enclosed License Agreement before you can use this product" - Halo PC

"All-new single-player campaigns, plus an enhanced multiplayer experience!" - Call Of Duty (PC)

"Do NOT call the Clerk of the Circuit Court" - Driving Ticket

"It's hot, tasty and good for you." - Jamba Juice Cupon

"Refer Inquiries to: [address]" - Random Cassette Tape Player

o_jinx · 02-21-2006, 01:27 AM

thermometer:

"For use orally, rectally or under the arm."

o_frenchtoast · 02-21-2006, 02:51 AM

^Best one yet

o_pussyhunter · 02-21-2006, 10:30 AM

Spray in bursts ... Liquid contents can cause frostbite ... do not puncture or incinerate even when empty ... if swallowed seek medical advice

The above taken from an 'invertible air duster' can on my desk

o_exarch · 02-21-2006, 01:39 PM

Hehe nice.
My colleague at work sent me this. Not quite the same but I thought I'd share.

Imagine if all major retailers started making their own condoms
and kept the same tag-line...

Sainsbury Condoms - making life taste better

Tesco Condoms - every little helps

Nike Condoms - Just do it.

Peugeot Condoms - The ride of your life.

Galaxy Condoms - Why have rubber when you can have silk.

KFC Condoms - Finger licking good.

Minstrels Condoms -melt in your mouth, not in your hands.

Safeway Condoms - Lightening the load.

Abbey National condoms - because life is complicated enough.

Coca Cola condoms - The real thing.

Ever Ready condoms - keep going and going.

Pringles condoms - once you pop, you cant stop

Burger King Condoms - Home of the whopper

Goodyear Condoms - for a longer ride go wide

FCUK condoms - no comment required.

Muller light condoms - so much pleasure, but where's the pain.

Halfords condoms - we go the extra mile.

Royal Mail condoms - I saw this and thought of you.

Andrex condoms - Soft, strong and very very long

Renault condoms - size really does matter!

Ronseal condoms - does exactly what it says on the tin

Ronseal quick-drying condoms - its dry and waterproof in 30 minutes

Domestos condoms - gets right under the rim!!! (Please)

Heineken condoms - reaches parts that other condoms just cannot reach

Carlsberg condoms - probably the best condom in the world

AA Condoms - for the 4th emergency service

Pepperami condoms - it's a bit of an animal

Polo condoms - the condom with the hole

The Manchester United Condom... One Yank and your whole world falls apart.

o_nezumi · 02-21-2006, 04:19 PM

All off of one label. This one nearly killed me:
1. Read and follow the included instructions for the safest riding position. All other use may risk injury.
2. Use in a clear and open area, check the terrain and avoid obstacles.
3. Do not use on ice or icy surfaces, near driveways, streets or highways; or near motorized vehicles of any kind.
4. Children should only use under adult supervision.
5. Use protective clothing such as a helmet, goggles, gloves, winter boots and warm clothing.
6. Do not tow behind any motorized vehicle.
7. Be aware this item does not have breakes or a steering mechanism and can develop high speeds under certain conditions.
8. Attempting stunts, areal tricks or jumps increases the risk of being seriously injured.

o_anshinritsumai · 02-21-2006, 04:38 PM

Side effects may include Chancroid, Chlamydia, Crabs, Gonorrhea, Hepatitis, Herpes, HIV and AIDS, HPV, Molluscum Contagiosum, NGU, PID, Scabies, Syphilis, Vaginitis/Trichomoniasis. Product is not for everyone, consult your partner before use.

o_deadly furby · 02-22-2006, 02:14 AM

Do not leave in an open air container.

o_nezumi · 02-22-2006, 04:44 PM

Note: The plug covers are marked on the inside with an "N" or and "H". To insure proper fit, use the caps marked with an "N" to cover the nuts and the caps marked with an "H" to cover the screw heads.

02-21-2006, 01:24 AM	#21
o_mooga Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: A Small Box Posts Rated Helpful 0 Times	"You must accept the enclosed License Agreement before you can use this product" - Halo PC "All-new single-player campaigns, plus an enhanced multiplayer experience!" - Call Of Duty (PC) "Do NOT call the Clerk of the Circuit Court" - Driving Ticket "It's hot, tasty and good for you." - Jamba Juice Cupon "Refer Inquiries to: [address]" - Random Cassette Tape Player

02-21-2006, 01:27 AM	#22
o_jinx Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Ohio Posts Rated Helpful 0 Times	thermometer: "For use orally, rectally or under the arm."

02-21-2006, 02:51 AM	#23
o_frenchtoast Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Markham, Ontario, Canada! Posts Rated Helpful 0 Times	^Best one yet

02-21-2006, 10:30 AM	#24
o_pussyhunter Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Northampton, England Posts Rated Helpful 0 Times	Spray in bursts ... Liquid contents can cause frostbite ... do not puncture or incinerate even when empty ... if swallowed seek medical advice The above taken from an 'invertible air duster' can on my desk

02-21-2006, 01:39 PM	#25
o_exarch Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Bath, UK Posts Rated Helpful 0 Times	Hehe nice. My colleague at work sent me this. Not quite the same but I thought I'd share. Imagine if all major retailers started making their own condoms and kept the same tag-line... Sainsbury Condoms - making life taste better Tesco Condoms - every little helps Nike Condoms - Just do it. Peugeot Condoms - The ride of your life. Galaxy Condoms - Why have rubber when you can have silk. KFC Condoms - Finger licking good. Minstrels Condoms -melt in your mouth, not in your hands. Safeway Condoms - Lightening the load. Abbey National condoms - because life is complicated enough. Coca Cola condoms - The real thing. Ever Ready condoms - keep going and going. Pringles condoms - once you pop, you cant stop Burger King Condoms - Home of the whopper Goodyear Condoms - for a longer ride go wide FCUK condoms - no comment required. Muller light condoms - so much pleasure, but where's the pain. Halfords condoms - we go the extra mile. Royal Mail condoms - I saw this and thought of you. Andrex condoms - Soft, strong and very very long Renault condoms - size really does matter! Ronseal condoms - does exactly what it says on the tin Ronseal quick-drying condoms - its dry and waterproof in 30 minutes Domestos condoms - gets right under the rim!!! (Please) Heineken condoms - reaches parts that other condoms just cannot reach Carlsberg condoms - probably the best condom in the world AA Condoms - for the 4th emergency service Pepperami condoms - it's a bit of an animal Polo condoms - the condom with the hole The Manchester United Condom... One Yank and your whole world falls apart.

02-21-2006, 04:19 PM	#26
o_nezumi Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: The Peoples Republic of Harmfull Free Radicals Posts Rated Helpful 0 Times	All off of one label. This one nearly killed me: 1. Read and follow the included instructions for the safest riding position. All other use may risk injury. 2. Use in a clear and open area, check the terrain and avoid obstacles. 3. Do not use on ice or icy surfaces, near driveways, streets or highways; or near motorized vehicles of any kind. 4. Children should only use under adult supervision. 5. Use protective clothing such as a helmet, goggles, gloves, winter boots and warm clothing. 6. Do not tow behind any motorized vehicle. 7. Be aware this item does not have breakes or a steering mechanism and can develop high speeds under certain conditions. 8. Attempting stunts, areal tricks or jumps increases the risk of being seriously injured.

02-21-2006, 04:38 PM	#27
o_anshinritsumai Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: San Diego Posts Rated Helpful 0 Times	Side effects may include Chancroid, Chlamydia, Crabs, Gonorrhea, Hepatitis, Herpes, HIV and AIDS, HPV, Molluscum Contagiosum, NGU, PID, Scabies, Syphilis, Vaginitis/Trichomoniasis. Product is not for everyone, consult your partner before use.

02-22-2006, 02:14 AM	#28
o_deadly furby Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Cell Block 17 Posts Rated Helpful 0 Times	Do not leave in an open air container.

02-22-2006, 04:44 PM	#29
o_nezumi Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: The Peoples Republic of Harmfull Free Radicals Posts Rated Helpful 0 Times	Note: The plug covers are marked on the inside with an "N" or and "H". To insure proper fit, use the caps marked with an "N" to cover the nuts and the caps marked with an "H" to cover the screw heads.

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