02-21-2006, 02:24 AM | #21 |
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: A Small Box
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"You must accept the enclosed License Agreement before you can use this product" - Halo PC
"All-new single-player campaigns, plus an enhanced multiplayer experience!" - Call Of Duty (PC) "Do NOT call the Clerk of the Circuit Court" - Driving Ticket "It's hot, tasty and good for you." - Jamba Juice Cupon "Refer Inquiries to: [address]" - Random Cassette Tape Player |
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02-21-2006, 02:27 AM | #22 |
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Ohio
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thermometer:
"For use orally, rectally or under the arm." |
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02-21-2006, 03:51 AM | #23 |
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Markham, Ontario, Canada!
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^Best one yet
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02-21-2006, 11:30 AM | #24 |
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Northampton, England
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Spray in bursts ... Liquid contents can cause frostbite ... do not puncture or incinerate even when empty ... if swallowed seek medical advice
The above taken from an 'invertible air duster' can on my desk |
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02-21-2006, 02:39 PM | #25 |
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Bath, UK
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Hehe nice.
My colleague at work sent me this. Not quite the same but I thought I'd share. Imagine if all major retailers started making their own condoms and kept the same tag-line... Sainsbury Condoms - making life taste better Tesco Condoms - every little helps Nike Condoms - Just do it. Peugeot Condoms - The ride of your life. Galaxy Condoms - Why have rubber when you can have silk. KFC Condoms - Finger licking good. Minstrels Condoms -melt in your mouth, not in your hands. Safeway Condoms - Lightening the load. Abbey National condoms - because life is complicated enough. Coca Cola condoms - The real thing. Ever Ready condoms - keep going and going. Pringles condoms - once you pop, you cant stop Burger King Condoms - Home of the whopper Goodyear Condoms - for a longer ride go wide FCUK condoms - no comment required. Muller light condoms - so much pleasure, but where's the pain. Halfords condoms - we go the extra mile. Royal Mail condoms - I saw this and thought of you. Andrex condoms - Soft, strong and very very long Renault condoms - size really does matter! Ronseal condoms - does exactly what it says on the tin Ronseal quick-drying condoms - its dry and waterproof in 30 minutes Domestos condoms - gets right under the rim!!! (Please) Heineken condoms - reaches parts that other condoms just cannot reach Carlsberg condoms - probably the best condom in the world AA Condoms - for the 4th emergency service Pepperami condoms - it's a bit of an animal Polo condoms - the condom with the hole The Manchester United Condom... One Yank and your whole world falls apart. |
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02-21-2006, 05:19 PM | #26 |
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: The Peoples Republic of Harmfull Free Radicals
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All off of one label. This one nearly killed me:
1. Read and follow the included instructions for the safest riding position. All other use may risk injury. 2. Use in a clear and open area, check the terrain and avoid obstacles. 3. Do not use on ice or icy surfaces, near driveways, streets or highways; or near motorized vehicles of any kind. 4. Children should only use under adult supervision. 5. Use protective clothing such as a helmet, goggles, gloves, winter boots and warm clothing. 6. Do not tow behind any motorized vehicle. 7. Be aware this item does not have breakes or a steering mechanism and can develop high speeds under certain conditions. 8. Attempting stunts, areal tricks or jumps increases the risk of being seriously injured. |
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02-21-2006, 05:38 PM | #27 |
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: San Diego
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Side effects may include Chancroid, Chlamydia, Crabs, Gonorrhea, Hepatitis, Herpes, HIV and AIDS, HPV, Molluscum Contagiosum, NGU, PID, Scabies, Syphilis, Vaginitis/Trichomoniasis. Product is not for everyone, consult your partner before use.
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02-22-2006, 03:14 AM | #28 |
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Cell Block 17
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Do not leave in an open air container.
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02-22-2006, 05:44 PM | #29 |
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: The Peoples Republic of Harmfull Free Radicals
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Note: The plug covers are marked on the inside with an "N" or and "H". To insure proper fit, use the caps marked with an "N" to cover the nuts and the caps marked with an "H" to cover the screw heads.
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